Tuesday, September 16, 2008

The (not at all) Wicked Stepmother

It's been one year and 4 months since our wedding, the same day my Mother-in-Law had a fatal stroke. And not quite two weeks ago, my Father-in-Law got remarried.

The wedding ceremony and reception were tastefully executed, paying the proper respect to the loving relationship that Joe and Terry had shared for 43 years, but not making it another memorial service. However, it was still uncomfortable for many in attendance. Especially my dear husband, who was asked to stand beside his Father in support of this new union, when he really just wanted to punch a wall several times that weekend. I imagine that the event brought a reality and a finality to his Mother's death, more so than even the ceremony we held at Christmas to place her ashes in a niche. And I know he misses her greatly everyday, but this particular day those feelings were brought to the forefront of his consciousness. His sister had a difficult time as well. As did several of Joe and Terry's friends, who just couldn't pull it together and truthfully shouldn't have come if they couldn't be strong and supportive for the family. And of course, it was a much happier occasion for her guests, which was awkward for those of us who didn't know how to feel about it.

Her name is Susan. They met on eHarmony just 2 months after Terry died. She is lovely, kind and generous, and always tries to be sensitive to the situation with Dave's family. And she brings laughter and joy to Joe's life, for which I am thankful.

But she isn't Terry. She isn't the Mother-in-Law I signed up for. She isn't the woman I had only started to know and love when she was taken from us. And now that Dave and I are starting our own family, I find myself torn about this new, and somewhat unfamiliar, relationship. Neither I nor Dave begrudge his Dad a new partner with whom to enjoy his retirement and travel and be happy. But I know that Dave is not comfortable having a stepmother, especially this quickly. And I cannot imagine having my children call her Grandma, because their Grandmother is gone.

So many of my friends have told me that I will have no control over what my kids will call their grandparents, because you can't predict what they will say when they first use words to address them. So I guess I'm hoping that the first one will come up with some clever, cute phrase that will stick, that doesn't include any form of the word "grandmother". Or that I can guide it somehow. Maybe Papa Joe and SueSue?

Monday, September 15, 2008

So I have a new job. Actually, I have had for about 3 months now. But given my latest experience with new jobs, I was reluctant to post anything until I knew how I felt about it (which is why there was never a post about my previous job, which SUCKED). Anyway, now the jury is in about the new job, and the unanimous verdict is that I LOVE IT!

Nevermind that I'm sick this week because the past two weeks have been insanely stressful and busy (we had our biggest tradeshow last week, which falls under my responsibility to plan and execute -- it went off with rave reviews, by the way). I still enjoy it. I like the people, I'm challenged by the workload, my boss actually cares about and provides feedback on my projects, I'm learning new things, I'm traveling less than before (but still a little bit, and to much more interesting places), I'm getting paid fairly (though I'd take more if they offered!), the benefits are good, the company structure and culture are a great fit for me, the headquarters are new and beautifully decorated, the commute isn't bad (and it's close to my husband's office, so we carpool sometimes), and we have a fancy coffee/tea machine and baskets of snacks. They even got me an ice cream cake for my birthday last month and sang to me. I do miss the view from my old office atop the 12th floor, but that's really it.

It only took one bad employment experience to learn what's most important to me in a work environment. So I guess for that I'm thankful. But I'm more thankful to be out of that job and into this one, where I feel like I actually have a future and where I don't have to be miserable for one third of my life!

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Psychic Revelations

My sister-in-law, Becky, visited a psychic recently. I don't necessarily believe in psychics, palm readers and the like, but I definitely think it would be entertaining to try it sometime. What I like even more, though, is when someone else tries it and learns something about me!

Apparently, when the psychic "saw" Becky's brother (my husband) and his wife (me), she saw a little girl soul tapping me on the shoulder.

Now I'm sure there could be many ways to interpret such a revelation. But since Dave and I have been talking about maybe trying to get pregnant in the next couple of months, the only interpretation I seem to be able to see is that there is a baby girl ready to join our family, just waiting for us to go off the pill (and apparently getting impatient -- we'll have to teach her when she gets here that tapping can sometimes be impolite!).

But like I said, I don't put my faith in these people who can "see the future" -- rather, I put my faith in God's plan for my life. However, it is really fun to think about having a little girl relatively soon -- maybe in as short as 10 months! (A note to my parents and anyone else who has been asking every time you see us: this is NOT, I repeat NOT, an announcement that we are pregnant.) We already have a name picked out. I have a couple of gender-neutral baby outfits that my grandmother gave to both me and my cousin when we were just teenagers. And the other day I was book shopping and found a baby food cookbook and a bedtime story book on sale -- so I bought them with the justification that we will hopefully need them someday. I guess now we just need to buy some pregnancy/parenting books, have a glass of wine, and get to it! :-)

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Holiday Housewarming

Hoping that most of our invitees would have more freedom in their schedules to attend our party, we avoided the craziness of the holiday season's festivities and held our holiday/housewarming party the first Saturday in January. And attend they did... in droves! There were about 50 of our closest friends and family packed into our little 1250-square-foot condo! I suppose the heavy rains that weekend helped clear everyone's schedules of other non-rain-friendly activities. But we were nonetheless honored that they all chose to spend their evening with us, some even making the trek from LA (about 55 miles on average) for our little soiree!

Our signature drink flopped (way too sweet, but thankfully we had the cocktail carousel there to save the day!), but the multitude of hors d-oeuvres were a hit. For a good portion of the night I couldn't even see my little Gracie walking around amidst the hundreds (literally) of legs. But she was the belle of the ball and she survived. As did the expensive new rug and wine glasses. Not a single glass was broken, nor spot made on the carpet. What lovely, respectful friends we have! Then toward the end of the night the party migrated to our third-floor loft (where the pole is installed) for a little debauchery. (OK, no real debauchery was had, but there were some amusing moments as friends tried to spin round the pole without the benefit of the months upon months of training I've received. That's why I need to hold a class at my home for my girlfriends - so they can know what they're doing next time!)

So now our house is warmed.


Greek Week

Last October, Dave and finally got to take our long-overdue, reschueduled honeymoon. After all that happened last year, we were in desperate need of a vacation.

So after two full days of travel (including the time difference), we arrived in Santorini, Greece. Although it was nearly midnight and totally dark, I could tell the Santorini Princess was going to be beautiful come sunrise. Our hotel staff had been eagerly awaiting our arrival since late that afternoon (we had a delayed flight from Athens and got to spend several hours in the Athens airport; we made good use of the time by buying a Greek-English language guide book and learning some key conversational phrases), and took us on a tour of the property that ended with perfectly chilled champagne in our room. I cannot say enough about the staff's friendliness, professionalism, and the level of service we received. Or for that matter, the friendliness of the Greek people in general -- they are just lovely!

We awoke the next morning to the most breathtaking view. Out the front door of our "apartment" was the lower deck of the pool. And because our hotel was built on the caldera, on the other side of the pool was a cliff straight down to the ocean. One morning we ordered room service for breakfast, and ate on our porch as we looked out over the vast Mediterranean Sea and the tiny specks of the other Cyclades Islands. Another night we went up to the top deck and had cocktails and appetizers while we took in a beautiful sunset. Add to that the fact that immediately to our right was the restaurant, and two doors to the left was the spa, and we couldn't have been happier with our room.

We spent our first day relaxing by the pool while George and Igor served us delicious and creative drinks, followed by a 90-minute couples massage in the on-site spa. That night after dinner we took a stroll to a nearby village for drinks at a local pub (or whatever the Greek equivalent is).

On day two we rented an ATV to go exploring around the small island. I think we covered every inch of road (and some areas that were not necessarily accessible by road) that day. We saw an ouzerie next to one of the 250+ churches on this island alone (even our hotel had a little church -- they were seriously everywhere!), and spent an hour trying to understand the story the owner was telling in broken English. Something about a donkey whisperer. The next two days pretty much went like this... breakfast at 11 am when we finally decided to get out of bed, a couple hours at the pool, several hours of riding around exploring and taking photos and stopping at roadside cafes, ouzeries, etc., then dinner in Oia at one of the many scenic restaurants there. Friday night we went out to a local club. I had tired of my casual clothes and flip-flops, and was excited to get dressed up and wear some high heels. Even though we were on an ATV. And even though we had to walk up and down cobblestone streets that were very steep because of the location of the town on the cliff. But it was still fun. Saturday night there was a rain storm, so we ordered room service and busted out a bottle of Ouzo for some strip Phase 10. (If you'd like the rules, we videoed the whole thing so I could remember how to play for future use, and I'd be happy to share -- the rules, not our video.)

Sunday we traded in our ATV for a Crossblade (way cooler than a regular Smart car), and went to the island's wine museum for a tour and some wine tasting. That night we were driving into Oia for dinner and came across a restaurant with a firepit. Since it was chilly that night, we decided this was where we should eat. Well, it turns out that this particular restaurant was where the local business owners came after they closed up shop. So we stayed for quite a while, listening to them sing and watching them dance, and soaking in the local culture. Monday was cold and windy, so we did some shopping and enjoyed a conversation at a cafe in Oia with another couple from Southern California.

The next morning we flew to Athens. We had planned one day in the capital at the end of the trip, to try to see some of the amazing historical and mythological sites there. Our cab driver was hysterical. He went on and on about where we should go (at least I think that's what he was saying -- we only undersood about every 10th word), and gave us some maps of the city that looked like they had been used more than a few times. Then when he dropped us at our hotel, he insisted I take his bright orange Shell Oil laniard (which was rather dirty) to hold my cell phone (which didn't work in Europe) and hotel key (which was a card, not a key). He was the sweetest man. Anyway, we spent 6 hours or so walking around the city, visiting the Acropolis, several temples, the national garden, the Olympic stadium, et al. And then after a quick nap, we found a great little wine bar near our hotel and had a leisurely dinner with a couple bottles of wine and played cards for three hours.

Then it was time to come home. Ten days is a perfect amount of time to feel like you've really gotten away, but in Europe it's just not enough because you're barely starting to become accustomed to the more relaxed lifestyle.

As soon as we finish editing and captioning the hundreds of photos we took, I'll post a slideshow if I can figure it out, or at least a few more photos.

Monday, January 21, 2008

The Happiest/Saddest Day of My Life

There aren't words to adequately describe the juxtaposition of emotions we felt on our wedding day. No one ever expects to couple such a joyous event with such a devastating loss. But the day itself was beautiful. The weather was perfect. I felt like a princess. And our photographer was amazing. So although we didn't get the celebration we had planned, and although our wedding-day memories are tainted with tears, we did manage to get some incredible images of Dave and I before the ceremony. (Regrettably, we didn't get any images of our families or wedding party -- those were planned for later in the day, and so they never happened.)
*Most images courtesy Natalie Moser Photography

Monday, January 07, 2008

More Than Meets the Eye

If you're my age and grew up with boys in the house, you know about the world of Autobots and Decepticons. But what you don't know is that Transformers are so much cooler as an adult.

Maybe it's the nostalgia talking, but I loved this movie when we saw it in the theater. And when we watched the DVD the other night that I got for Christmas, I loved it just as much (it helps to have all the HD technology for this one). When Optimus Prime and Megatron showed up, along with several other original characters, well it just took me back. Sure, it won't be winning any Oscars (except maybe for the special effects), but it was wildly entertaining. Now I just need to buy the toys.